whatbethsays:

so it was my brother’s thirteenth birthday today and he came home from school with this horror-struck expression on his face and came into my room and sort of just stood there

and i asked him “what’s wrong?”

and he said “MY GIRLFRIEND HUGGED ME AND SAID HAPPY BIRTHDAY”

and i was like “well that’s good isn’t it?”

and then he came closer and just whispered, really quietly “no you don’t understand i said happy birthday BACK”

im still laughing oH FUCK

(via guy)

me: wow I'm fat
me: maybe I look ok
me: I AM PERFECT THE WAY I AM
me: I'm fucking disgusting I'm losing weight now
me: I am more than just my weight!
me: who the fuck cares about anything
me: I AM SO FAT.
me: idk curves are beautiful i am beautiful
me: i hate myself

casparleessluttt:

carysgotafanblog:

Daniel please wear suits more often 

he’s so attractive in a suit what is life

(Source: dylanoriens, via imaginexmexnaked)

gnarly:

Waking up in the middle of the night and realizing you still have time to sleep

image

(via sniffing)

"A woman is only vulnerable when her nail polish is drying, and even then she can still pull a trigger."

some great quote I heard somewhere once upon a time and that is very, very true (via a-thousand-words)

(Source: traffic-jam-session, via kohwala)

meladoodle:

"jokes are just jokes! get back in the kitchen you fat bitch before i rape you! just kidding! haha see everything is alright now! im not sexist! take a joke!"

laughhard:

I never noticed this.

laughhard:

I never noticed this.

(via awkwardvagina)

onthesideoftheotters:

shotadreams:

mage-of-katnep:

rainbowsfireworks:

confusedtree:

ollivander:

lampghost:

[sleep-over voice] are you awake

[sleep-over reply voice] yeah

[regrettable sleepover invitee voice] you guys SHH

[confused sleep-over voice] what is the meaning of life

[annoyed sleep-over voice] dude shut up

[sleep-over host voice] you guys be quiet my moms gonna hear us

[unknown voice] you kids wanna buy some drugs

(via oknope)